The Return
by actionman81
Summary: Olivia Benson gets a knock on the door, and her whole life changes.


The doorbell rang. Olivia Benson, Lieutenant, mother, got up to open the door. "Lucy must be back with Noah. I'm sure he'll have lots to tell me" she smiled.  
She opened the door, but Lucy wasn't on the other side.  
"What are you doing here?" she questioned him  
"I couldn't stay away any longer, Liv" he confessed  
"You were gone for six years" she countered  
"I didn't have a choice. I had to"  
"You could've called me" she rationalized  
"I couldn't"  
"Don't give me that garbage"  
"Liv" he began.  
She slapped him hard across the face. He flinched.  
"I deserved that" his eyes flashed cobalt.  
"Damn it, El" she exhaled, "Where were you when I needed you?"  
"I should've been here for you"  
She looked away "I still need you- now." It wasn't like her to sound this vulnerable. She hated the way she was behaving, and yet, how could she fight her feelings?  
"No you don't" he was firm, "You're strong, resilient. Liv, you're a survivor."  
"I am" she looked in his eyes, "but it hasn't been the same."  
He took a step in the apartment. She didn't stop him. "I'm here now" he didn't break his gaze from her, "Is it enough?"  
She wanted to say that he was always more than enough for her but how could she, when he was married with five children?  
"You've-" she began  
His cheek stung from her hand, but his heart was pounding loudly in his ears He reached up to touch his face, and she saw it.  
No wedding ring  
"Liv" he began, "There's something I've got to tell you" he glanced down at his shoes momentarily. His gaze drifted along the carpeting. Preschool toys were strewn on the floor  
"I guess you have something to tell me, also"  
She took his hand in hers, touching his fingers.  
She squeezed his hand, "I didn't want to be the cause of you & Kathy-"  
He didn't let her finish. He had to let her know, "You were never that"  
"The entire precinct was joking about us"  
"Let them" Elliot's steel blues took her in. Olivia hesitated. "You know what's true," he intoned.  
Olivia sighed. She knew.  
The precinct had seen and understood what she didn't want to admit to herself, She looked up and saw Elliot practically eating her alive with his eyes.  
He knew the truth; Just as much as she did.  
They were together.  
Today.  
Right now.  
It would be so easy to act on her dreams, desires, hopes  
"El" she bit her lip.  
He squeezed her hand, "Maybe I'm rushing" he let go of her hand.  
"No" she grasped it again, "I never stopped wanting you." The words tumbled out before she could stop them.  
Elliot's face broke out into a wide grin. Hearing her say it was everything he'd hoped for & more.  
"Let's sit down" she brought him to the couch  
"You're right" she began, "my life is very different" Elliot took in the room Trucks & blocks were everywhere.  
"Does he have your eyes?" It was all he had to ask. The meaning was unmistakable.  
"El" she sighed, "Yes, I do have a son, but it's not like that."  
He smiled, "I always thought that you'd be a great Mum"  
"I know" Olivia nodded, smiling. She remembered what he'd said all those years ago, in their car, "Look, maybe you should start thinking about having kids. And any way you want to do it I'd support you"  
"I meant that" he knew what she was thinking about, "I still mean it." He looked in her eyes, "I'd support you in any way. Just let me know"  
Olivia looked worried. She hadn't thought about anything like this happen, not really, not out of a daydream or fantasy.  
Elliot nodded, "I'm sure he's got a great Dad" he patted her knee.  
"No" she blurted out. It was too late- too much time had gone by to deal with niceties, "I'm a single mother right now"  
Elliot didn't mince words, "Do you need help? Anything. Just tell me"  
Olivia changed the topic, "El, I dreamed about something like this. You coming back. I missed you so much when you left without so much as a word. You never came back for you stuff, and I had clean out your desk"  
"I'm sorry" he rubbed her knee, "I should've – I-" he faltered, uncharacteristically, over the words.  
"No, you didn't" she was firm momentarily, then softened, "What happened?"  
"I couldn't come- I just-" he struggled.  
"You said that already" she corrected.  
"Liv, I was undercover. I've been undercover for the past several years now," he confessed. Olivia sat there, unable to move, momentarily in shock over what she'd heard. No, not shock, but the suddenness of his revelation. Everything seemed to click into place. Everything made sense- the lack of contact, the phone calls that were never returned; the way that even the Stablers were never mentioned at the precinct. In fact, along with others, she'd referred to Elliot as "my old partner" rather than saying his name. Had it been an unspoken realization that something had shifted between them- the job?  
"When we were working on that case, with the animals" Elliot went on. He leaned closer, obviously concerned for her, "I spoke to one of the cops, he'd been undercover, and he said that it had cost him his family. I didn't know it at the time, but it would end up costing mine" he sighed.  
"Elliot" she slipped her hand inside of his and squeezed it, "I'm so sorry"  
"It's not your fault" he smiled, "it never was" he squeezed her hand as well. She knew exactly what he meant with that addendum. Kathy Stable had been sure that the pair was sleeping together, and had poisoned her own children's minds with the rhetoric and propaganda. Teenage son Richard had accused Olivia of sleeping with Elliot, and even Kathleen had seen there were—sparks? There was something between the two of them. Elliot seemed to be able to gauge her thoughts,  
"Liv, you never did anything to come between Kathy and me. The world can think that-"  
"And what did the world say?" she countered.  
"Fin made jokes, and half the ADAs said we were too close" he was frank, "look, none of that mattered."  
"The hell it didn't" she frowned. She inhaled, ready to speak, "why now? What made you come back, here, after all this time?" she had to know.  
"I was able to" he confessed, "Liv, this is the first time I've been able to get away. The case is over. I don't have to be undercover anymore" he searched her face for understanding, and then tried to further explain, "It's taken this long for me to be there, gain their trust, put them away and – come back to you."  
In cases like this, when a response is filled with anger, blue eyes are said to flash, green eyes are said to shine. What do brown eyes do? Elliot soon found out. The light went out from her Olivia's eyes.  
"It's taken nearly six years for you to close the case?"  
Elliot nodded.  
"I'd like to believe that, I really would" she stood up, "I couldn't just put my life on hold for you. I had to move on" she explained, perhaps for herself as well as for him, "It wasn't something that wanted to do at first-"  
"Liv" he stood up. They were eye to eye, "I understand. I would never have asked you to stop growing, stop being better every day. I meant what I said, you're my partner for better or worse. This was – well, it happened to be the worse."  
"You can't just walk into my life again like nothing changed" she raised her voice.  
"I know things changed" he was quiet, "I learned so much, having to be away, having to lose respect from my family, and having to try to gain it all back- maybe I'll never make things right again" he took her hand in his. She didn't pull it away, "Liv, I'm good at a lot of things, but getting over you was never one of them," he squeezed her hand, "I can't ask for us to pick up where we left off, but I was hoping that maybe we can start over again."  
"That chapter in our life – lives – is over" she sighed.  
"How about a new chapter?" he looked at her eagerly.  
She looked into his cobalt eyes, "El, it's been so long,"  
"We can make up for lost time" he smiled.  
The door opened and a dark haired boy of about four rushed in, "Mummy, I'm home!" he ran into the apartment. He skidded to a halt when he saw Elliot standing there. A young woman entered behind him, carrying a child's backpack. "He just rushed ahead" she explained. She too, stopped, and looked from Elliot to Olivia.  
"Lucy" Olivia explained, "This is Elliot. We knew each other from work"  
"Oh" she nodded, looking Elliot up and down.  
"I'll call you about next week, ok?" Olivia instructed Lucy.  
"Sure" she agreed, and left quickly.  
Olivia crouched down. "Noah, this is my friend Elliot." She smiled.  
He looked up at the man, "I know you."  
Elliot looked surprised. Olivia did as well. Where was this coming from?"  
"Mummy has a picture of you."  
Olivia colored. Elliot grinned, "Really?" he got onto one knee so he was eye level with the boy, "Do you think you could show me?"  
"Sure" he grabbed Elliot's hand, "It's over here!" and dragged him down a hallway to presumably, the master bedroom. On the night stand, among novels, a pair of eyeglasses, and a digital clock, stood a photo of Elliot. Actually, a photo of them together; Elliot recognized it from a case they'd worked on together. He turned back to the doorway. Olivia stood there, watching him. Watching them, Elliot and Noah, together, "Maybe we can start that chapter after all," she smiled.


End file.
